


Growing Pains

by Always_Bottom_Derek



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Bad BDSM Etiquette, Bondage, Bottom Derek Hale, Edgeplay, Enemas, F/M, Grooming, Hurt Derek Hale, In March 2019?!, Kinktober 2018, Knifeplay, Loss of Anal Virginity, Older Woman/Younger Man, Pegging, Rape Aftermath, Rape/Non-con Elements, Sensory Deprivation, Temperature Play, Yeah - Crazy- I know!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-25
Updated: 2019-03-25
Packaged: 2019-12-07 20:07:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18239624
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Always_Bottom_Derek/pseuds/Always_Bottom_Derek
Summary: Kate leans down and kisses Derek.He can't get over how soft her lips are or how sweet she tastes. Mostly though, he still can’t believe that he’s one of a privileged few in the world who gets to know such intimate things about her.“Are you comfortable, babe?” she asks.The truth of the matter is he isn't. But he's not about to say anything. Not when he sees the lustful glitter in her gorgeous eyes and his sensitive nose can smell just how wet she is.No, he’s not going to ruin this moment for her; even though he’s lying on his back, naked, on a rough wooden table in one of the Argents’ outbuildings. Hands and feet cuffed to the table legs spread-eagled, his limbs ache already from the stretch.He knows he could easily break these bonds in a second. But they've been engaged in these sort of games for several weeks now. Ones that are frightening and thrilling in equal measure every time.And even though Derek has been uneasy with Kate's kinky escalations, he wants to show her he's ready to live in the world of adults, eager to prove he's not just some teenage kid almost half her age but a man.A man who’s strong enough to keep up with her every erotic inclination.





	Growing Pains

**Author's Note:**

> Still cleaning out old files. This was one I'd started for last fall's Kink-tober prompts fills. The prompts were Knife Play, Temperature Play, Edge Play, and Sensory Deprivation. Was feeling inspired and decided to finish it finally.
> 
> At the time I'd had a request for "pegging" so Kate and Derek fell into this fic. 
> 
> Have to say this was fucking intense to write. If the tags aren't enough, trigger warning for sexual abuse survivors.

Kate leans down and kisses Derek.

He can't get over how soft her lips are or how sweet she tastes. Mostly though, he still can’t believe that he’s one of a privileged few in the world who gets to know such intimate things about her.

“Are you comfortable, babe?” she asks.

The truth of the matter is he isn't. But he's not about to say anything. Not when he sees the lustful glitter in her gorgeous eyes and his sensitive nose can smell just how wet she is.

No, he’s not going to ruin this moment for her; even though he’s lying on his back, naked, on a rough wooden table in one of the Argents’ outbuildings. Hands and feet cuffed to the table legs spread-eagled, his limbs ache already from the stretch.

He knows he could easily break these bonds in a second. But they've been engaged in these sort of games for several weeks now. Ones that are frightening and thrilling in equal measure every time.

And even though Derek has been uneasy with Kate's kinky escalations, he wants to show her he's ready to live in the world of adults, eager to prove he's not just some teenage kid almost half her age but a man.

A man who’s strong enough to keep up with her every erotic inclination.

So instead of complaining about the pull of his muscles or the way the wood scrapes against his shoulders and his ass, he just nods. She likes it better when he’s the strong silent type anyway. And this little lie is so worth it when it gets him another kiss, only this time it’s deep and sweet.

Trussed like this, he lets Kate conquer his mouth just like he’s allowed her to conquer so much of the rest of him. But how could he resist, really? That such a beautiful older woman is willing to have anything to do with him is such an unbelievable turn on.

At his groin, Derek’s cock juts straight up, hard and aching. It has been this way for a while now. The ringed the contraption he let her put on it pinches, however, and the leather strap encircling his bursting balls feels way too tight.

But, he reminds himself, his cheeks growing hot, it's what he needs. At 17, he comes way too fast and he wants to be like the men in the videos Kate shares with him. The ones of older guys who are able to give their partners endless-seeming fucks.

And besides, he knows he should be grateful for how willing she is to help him train his dick.

When she breaks their kiss, Kate runs her fingers through his bangs. “I know you're going to love this.”

She laughs then. It's the rich sound of a grown woman, not the silly giggle of the girls he goes to school with and it makes his heart flutter.

“Oh, and I didn’t mention this before, but just so you know… Those cuffs are spelled. So, you’re not going to be able to just pop out of them. No shifting either.

“See, my father uses them sometimes when he's dealing with certain, er, supernatural matters…”

The truth in these words following her laughter kill the butterflies in Derek’s belly and sets his heart pounding.

“But we’re just going to have fun with them. I promise.”

He knows too well the activities of Kate's family but, like her, he doesn't agree with them. Or his own family’s small-minded prejudices, for that matter.

It's one of the many things they have in common. And it's only because of this that he's able push down against the dark fear rising in his core when she walks away and returns, bearing in her hands a small-looking, black latex hood.

When he starts to ask “what?” she puts a finger to his lips to shush him.

“Trust me, sweetheart I'm going to give you the experience of a lifetime this afternoon.” Her finger slips between his lips and begins to gently stroke his tongue.

“Have I ever led you wrong yet?”

The answer so far has been “no,” even though there's many things they've done of late that have left him feeling oddly dirty after.

Right now though he's not thinking about that: he’s too consumed with making her happy. So he makes his body go lax and stays silent, despite the frantic beating of his heart as she pulls the finger from his mouth and slips the hood over his head.

“It’s even got olfactory filters for your kind. Total sensory deprivation” is the last thing he hears before his world goes dark.

He finds he’s not prepared for the sudden blackness, the lack of sound as his ears are covered.

When the hood slides over his nose the filtered air-holes seem much to small and he panics. His terror dissipates some when it’s revealed the mask ends there, just above his upper lip.

At least, until he opens his mouth to tell Kate he doesn’t like this, and has his words cut off. A metal ring gag roughly shoves between teeth and is quickly buckled tight at the back of his head.

A rubber ball is added to this, also strapped on to further encumber his already gagged mouth and it’s hard for him to get a good breath.

This is bad because, left alone in the rapidly heating claustrophobic dark of the hood, suddenly Derek understands for the first time how truly helpless he is and his need for air escalates quickly.

He makes a muffled noise of complaint. It’s ignored at first. But then a long-nailed hand drags slowly across his chest. Kate's slender palm settles over his heart and it just sits there, despite the fact she must be able to feel how hectically it’s beating.

She waits and he’s forced to wait with her.

Derek’s world is reduced to this fragile point of contact. Fortunately, there's something soothing in the way her hand lingers. The panicked thrashing of his head stills. Eventually his breathing evens out and his fingers stop clenching.

Behind the hood though, he's thinking they should have agreed upon a sign: some sort of “safe word,” a hand signal to “stop.”

While still naive in many ways, he knows that much, at least, from their love-making session where Kate had him tie her up.

But then, he reasons, this is just another one of her many tests where she's asking him to show her how much he trusts her. She’s just as insecure as he is sometimes, he thinks, though he’d never say this. And so he lays there.

Although, it's not really like he has a choice in this surrender.

After what seems like forever, Kate's hand begins to move. Her other hand joins and she rubs over his chest. She takes her time playing with his tender nipples. Until he’d met her, he had no idea even of the pleasure those little buds could bring him. And the way she teases them now leaves him gasping.

His back arches up off the table when she suddenly pinches hard enough to bruise. Derek cries out around the gag, though this rough bit of nipple torture isn’t new enough that it should have surprised him.

Then her warm hands leave his tits to stroke down his quivering belly. In her downward journey she skates around his bound cock. He'd like to think she's admiring him as she moves but it’s hard to hold that thought, he’s so aware of his many deficits.

His head is raised, his neck strains, trying to follow her movements in his blindness.

His skull thumps back against the table in frustration when her hands leave him. He curses the hood, its blackness.

 _You didn't mind being blindfolded that last time_ , he tells himself.

But this is more than just darkness, it’s the fact that he can only hear his own hammering heart, the blood thrumming in his ears. Can only smell his own gathering, fearful sweat.

It’s terrifying to suddenly be denied the senses he relies upon so deeply to navigate the world. The worst part, however, is being a left alone in sensory void with only his frantic thoughts. But then finally something happens that drives his internal crashing chaos into silence.

He hisses and his chest comes up off the table again at the cold bite of ice against one of his pinch-bruised nipples. It stings and burns and almost tickles in a way that's maddening more than painful.

Then cube lifts and there's relief.

But only for a moment, because  it’s suddenly sliding across his chest to torture his other bud. There’s an even greater shock to his abandoned nipple, left cold and numb, when it’s suddenly seized by a warm, wet heat as Kate covers it with her mouth.

She suckles it at her leisure, occasionally taking its tip between her teeth and pulling. Numbness shifts to a burn and the contrast between the ice on his other nipple and the scorching heat of her mouth is indescribable.

He utters a muffled yelp of surprise he can’t hear when the ice leaves his nipple and the cube is dragged down between his pecs over the flat plains of his belly. Once there, she lets the frozen chip rest in the dish of his navel while her mouth warms up the nipple that's just been left.

Under the heat of his skin the ice melts. It pools in his belly button and cool water drips down his heaving sides in an agonizing tickle.

Despite these tortures his cock stands as hard as ever and the hot leak of it slides down his shaft in the same maddening way as the beaded water rolling down his sides.

When Kate’s mouth leaves him, he’s left to waiting and darkness again. He doesn't know how long she’s gone but it’s at least long enough for a thousand new thoughts to race crossed his mind.

What if she leaves him for good? How would he get out of this then? What if someone else comes? What if she asked someone else to join her? That last one is something she's talked about more than once, and it’s not another woman she’s mentioned bringing in.

Derek yells around the gag then when the frigid bite of ice unexpectedly attacks his cockhead. The only plus to the pain is that this ceases his silent litany of terrifying questions.

No sensation he's experienced in life could have ever prepared him for how this hurts, especially with the way his ringed cock tries futilely to shrink against the cold.

There’s other pain too, as his already tight aching balls attempt to draw up, only to hitch hard against encircling leather.

Kate must hear his muffled shouting but she doesn't show it. Nor does she pay any attention to his frantic wiggling. She's merciless, letting the ice melt against his shaft, dragging it down to his balls to rub it against them in tiny circles.

Derek bucks and the cuffs cut deep into his wrists and ankles when the she holds the cube tight against his taint. He goes still, however, when it drops down to press against his asshole.

_She wouldn’t…_

She’s stuck her finger in his ass a few times when he’s been fucking her, even though he’s told her how weird that feels. That it’s not really something he’s into.

Maybe it’s because of this, or maybe because his pucker is clenched so tight as to be presently be impenetrable, she seems content to simply circle it there.

It’s indescribable, the bite, the burn, the way it melts and drips and tickles all at once.

But this is nothing compare to what he feels when, once again, Kate’s mouth follows.

It seem sacrilegious for her to touch him here, this way, in his filthiest place. But the sensations of her petal soft lips, and hot, slick tongue lavishing attention on his hole, is like nothing he could have imagined. It's one of the most amazing things he's ever experienced.

And it’s like every nerve of his rim is connected to his cock. Derek groans and loses himself in the intense sensation. His balls throb and he knows, were it not for their constriction, he would have come immediately.

Kate is intense in her focus. Determined. And she works his ass until his hole is soft and tender. It's an exquisite sort of ecstasy and Derek drifts in it.  

At least, until her mouth drops off to be replaced by the press of something small and hard and slick at his hole.

The gag blunts his shout of surprise.

Unfortunately, when he wiggles against what’s probing his asshole trying to get away, it seems to only help work the intruder in.

Suddenly, his bowels heat up as a rush of hot fluid pulses into him. At first he's too stunned by the sensation, this twist in events, to even move. But then as the liquid continues to flow, quickly, his guts begin to cramp.

When the flush of hot water stops and the nozzle is removed he’s too preoccupied with trying to literally hold his shit together to pay much attention to the way his arm restraints are loosened just enough for Kate to grab his legs and pull him so his ass hangs down barely over the edge of the table.

Knees bent now, it's amazing how quickly she secures them. Leather bands are quickly buckled strapping calf to thigh.

But Derek is hardly paying attention, too lost in horrified shame as he loses the battle he's been fighting and the muscles of his ass give out, sending spasms of loose, watery shit from his pulsating asshole.

What feels even more shameful is his helplessness and the way Kate cleans him up with a warm, wet cloth afterward, just like a baby. It's sticky and hot behind the hood when he begins to cry. Since he can’t hear them he hopes his sobs are silent.

They’re not but they might as well be, given the way Kate responds.

He's forced to submit to the nozzle once again for another purging.

The third time the nozzle finds him, it's not water he's filled with. In his emptiness Derek can immediately tell the difference.

For one, it's cooler by far. Thicker too. But this sense of thickness is nothing compared to the fat, blunt pressure that teases him once the slender nozzle is pulled from its final violation.

Derek is beside himself. He doesn't want this. He doesn't want this at all! He never did! And it's not just what he’s certain is a dildo threatening his virgin hole.

No. It's feeling completely powerless and knowing he brought this upon himself. It's the pain he feels at his own stupidity, ever the dumb jock no matter how many books he reads, obtuse enough to allow himself to get into this situation in the first place.

After a minute silicone is pulled away and Derek can't help but feel relief when it's replaced with what is clearly one of Kate's slender fingers. He despises the grateful tears he cries at her kindness when she carefully slips this finger in and begins to work him open.

But his gratitude only last an instant as the sensation he’s going to shit grips him again.

The idea of defecating on Kate’s hand, even though she’s violating him, sends new spasms of shame up his spine.

He tries to fight it at first, but his muscles are tired from all their recent exertions. When he succumbs to the spasms only to realize he’s empty, he tries to clench and keep her probing digit out.

Then his captive mind recalls the massive selection of fake cocks Kate has shown him. None of them small. And even though the implications of it shreds him, he finally forces his body to relax. Hoping that if he doesn't fight it, it will make, what he fears is the inevitable intrusion, hurt less.

Within the senseless void of the hood everything is reduced to glass-edged, sharp physical sensations: the strain of his arms, the raw rub of leather at his wrists, the way the wooden edge of the table digs harshly into his ass.

And above all of this, the relentless penetration of Kate's fingers, now two, pumping in and out of him.

It still feels weird and the pressure, while not physically painful, is definitely uncomfortable at best.

Even more distressing, however, is that under the persistence of her attentions, as Kate repeatedly skates over a certain spot inside him, gradually his discomfort shifts and begins to feel like something akin to pleasure.

As much as Derek's mind tries to resist the growing heat in his belly and the throb of his tethered balls, his cock is unencumbered by thought. It had waned first at his asshole’s violation as much as its bonds allowed, but now it's blood-proud again and even harder than before.

Maybe it’s his fear that even with his balls bound he might come from having something in his ass alone that spurs Derek into action.

Whatever the reason, he suddenly throws himself anew against his restraints and yells as loud as he can behind the gag. It’s more than terrifying, the fact he still hears nothing, weighed against way his lungs burn from the exertion of his screaming.

He stops when he feels the bite of steel against his ravaged throat.

A blade presses hard and slips, scraping off a bit of the teenage stubble he’s been cultivating to make himself look older, despite his mother’s disapproval. And it’s at the thought of Talia that he truly begins to sob.

There’s nothing more in this moment he wants than to see her again, to be safe and cradled in her arms. This wars with his shame: that he’s immature enough to have this impulse, along with the fact, he’s been secretly involved with Kate to spite his alpha.

His longing and his failures eviscerate him in ways the knife currently sliding along his jugular can never hope to match.

His breath hitches and with the way his nose is covered, Derek has no choice but to swallow his own snot, continuing to cry as Kate slices tiny lines along his neck.

Kate could kill him here. Right now. And no one would ever know what happened.

The seed of fear planted at the moment she told him he was well and truly bound fully blooms in his chest: that maybe Kate’s really not so different from the rest of her clan. The knife scores lower, a dozen places as it moves down his belly. There’s the return of tickling trickle but this time it’s his blood, not water.

The blade grazes his cock and he howls as the tender tip of his dick is nicked. Suddenly death doesn't seem like the worst thing that could happen.

He wants to scream and beg but he’s so terrified he can’t draw enough breath to shout.

Caught in a primal frozen terror, he’s deathly still as the knife moves again. He remains that way as its tip scratches a circle around the base of his ringed, deflated cock and is dragged downwards, just hard enough to score the tight skin of his bound scrotum.

It comes to rest against the base of his balls and remains there.

It’s shortly joined by the returned sensation of something large, greased, and blunt, tapping against his fear-tight hole. Derek stays lax this time and doesn’t fight the pressure as it wrestles the muscles of his sphincter into submission.

His mouth gasps behind the gag as his body opens, but it doesn’t feel like his mouth any more.

For a moment the black of the hood disappears and he finds himself staring down from outside himself. A hover-view over the table shows his bound form and Kate, intent and smiling, as she fucks a thick, black silicone cock deep into him.

So much thicker than her slim two fingers, even with the lube pumped into his channel earlier the stretch is painful. He feels the burning urge to shit again and the cramps and the ache bring him hurtling back down into his skin.

His head rolls back and forth against the hardwood cradling it. His neck aches almost as much as his ass from its coiled tension.

Voice returned, deep in his raw throat he growls and groans behind the gag.

But Kate is merciless.

She pumps slow and shallow at first then gradually deeper and deeper. Her thrusts are unrelenting.

The knife finally falls away at last and somehow Derek knows this is only because she is now using both her hands to push her false cock into him.

Kate goes so deep she finally hits something that makes his spine arch up off the table at the pain. Still she batters him it until it gives way.

Truly now penetrated to his core, Derek has never felt so deeply broken.

Maybe she senses her victory because, although she doesn’t pull out, she pulls back.

Still split wide, with the return of these shallower thrusts, Derek’s traitorous cock once again becomes emboldened. The deep aching pleasure he’d felt when Kate fucked him with her fingers returns.

There’s no more room for tears inside the tight hood but Derek weeps anyway as the pain of his torture is slowly stolen from him.

Kate fucks him hard and fast now and the pressure and the tingling tension builds. There’s a potent buzz in his balls that worms its way up to his low spine and squirms from there into his belly.

Then then band constricting his sac is snapped off. The one on his cock loosens.

Slick, slender fingers encircle his drooling dick and strip it. Pushed into and pulled apart simultaneously, his body goes rigid and then spasms. The shuttered sounds he makes are animal.

His cock erupts and he finally, shatteringly, comes.

Minutes pass afterward...

Derek is focusing on simply breathing, his heart is still jack rabbiting in his chest when he suddenly realizes his ass is empty. The vacancy is startling and uncomfortable.

Even with his enhanced healing, his battered muscles can’t immediately recover. He understands he’s gaping when a tickle of cool air wicks up his raw, quivering channel.

He feels fingers tug at the hood and the dim light of the shed seems blinding when it lifts. He has to close his eyes against it. A warm cloth wipes the mess from his face.

Soft hair tickles his cheeks and his eyes reopen. Kate is bent over him staring down, grinning. She’s vibrating with excitement and practically glowing.

“Fuck, babe. I’ve never been so turned on in my life. That was the hottest thing I’ve ever seen! Glad we did that out here where no one could hear us.

"Damn, you were loud!”

Soft lips press to Derek’s sweaty forehead in a kiss. Kate whispers in his ear, “and I am so damn wet.”

Turning his head slightly he sees the leather straps crossing her bare hips. Jutting from her crotch, her mons are obscured by same fat black cock he saw in his vision.

“I tried to wait, but at the end there, just before I jacked you off, I was so turned on I had to jack myself off first. I came so hard. Squirted all over my hand.”

There’s a soft nip to Derek’s earlobe that feels as violating as the cock that just raped him.

“God… I’m still so horny. I hope you have some cum in those teenage balls of yours because I can’t wait for you to fuck me.”

Kate is working the buckle on the ball gag when she notices the tears in his eyes. “Awww, babe.” She wipes them away with her fingers. “I know… That was intense. Right?”

She pulls the ball free and then goes to loosen the spider gag. “But you were so perfect, Derry.”

He’s never hated her stupid nick-name for him as much as he does now. and he winces at the way it tumbles merrily from her mouth.

“I swear a couple times I was almost convinced you thought I would actually hurt you. And the way you struggled and fought… Perfect.

"I’ve never seen anything so amazing.”

Jaw too tired to unhinge any further, the bit clacks against his teeth as she pulls it.

“Wish I’d thought to video us so we could watch it again later. Like I said, I’ve never seen anything that turned me on as much as you did today.”

At several points during his bondage Derek imagined what he’d do when. If. He was freed again. They all had involved jumping up, grabbing Kate. Shaking her. Yelling.

Nothing in his mind envisioned him as he finds himself now: aching jaws silent and slack, allowing her to massage them.

“I was so nervous you might freak out. Think this was real.” Kate’s fingers leave him to free other bonds. She laughs as she fumbles with the buckles on his left wrist.

“But if I’d told you, it wouldn’t been so vivid. I mean, I love you, babe, but you’re a terrible actor.

“And I wanted the surprise to be authentic.

“I just had to trust you were mature enough. Ready… After all the stuff we’ve done. And trust that you had enough trust in me to do you right.

"And you did.

"I mean, I don’t want to ruin the moment, but we just proved once again that we’re not our families.”

Even after Kate removes all his bonds Derek just lays there. He’s unable to move, pinned by the weight of all his conflicting emotions. Authenticity or not, she had no right to do what she did without asking.

And here she is now, laughing and petting him, singing his praises.

So fucking happy.

And him? He feels violated, angry, exhausted, confused. But most of all he just feels empty.

Finally he struggles up to a sitting position, legs dangling over the edge of the table. Kate sets her hands on his shoulders to help.

Derek glances down at the blood staining his torso. Following his gaze, Kate gives him a sheepish grin that doesn’t match the gleam in her eyes.

“Guess I went overboard with the knife-play, huh? It was just such a turn on… Good thing you heal so fast.” she turns away to wet a cloth in the shed’s rusty sink which she uses to sponge away the evidence of her enthusiasm.

“What did you think about the ice though?”

Derek’s head aches from crying and his throat is raw from his screams. “It was good,” he lies hoarsely.

“I bet it was. I think it must have been all good for you. Your dick barely flagged and I’ve never seen you cum so hard!”

Kate pushes his naked thighs apart and slips between them, overlooking the overt way he shrinks when her dick brushes his. She catches his jaw in her hands and kisses him deeply.

He wants to push her away but he doesn’t have any fight left in him. He tells himself, _what’s one more submission in the face of her happiness_.

“Knew you’d love it. We’re the perfect pair, you and I,” Kate breathes when she breaks the kiss.

Derek is saved from having to agree by the chime of a phone.

Pressing the now cool cloth into his hands, Kate makes a beeline for her purse. She checks the screen and her glow slips.

“Shit, it’s my calendar. I forgot that school board meeting tonight!” She frowns. “I can’t miss it and I’m supposed to help get the gym ready.

“Babe, I hate to do this, but I have to go. Damn, I was hoping we could fuck again too...”

She shoots him an apologetic look as she starts stripping out of her strap on and steps into her panties.

“This makes me shit for aftercare, doesn’t it?”

Truthfully, Derek is kind of relieved that she has to leave, unsure of how much longer he can hold himself together, frayed as he feels.

So he shakes his head and gives her a wave of his hand hoping she perceives it as casual and not weary.

“I’m fine,” he says.

Roughened by his screams his voice is lower than normal.

“Go ahead. Don’t worry about me. Gotta stay on top of your job, right? I’d miss you if you got fired.”

Kate brightens and gathers up her things before darting over to give him a final quick kiss. “What did I say before? Mature. Amazing. You are simply the best!

“Oh, and don’t worry about picking up here. I’ll come back and clean up later. You just worry about yourself.

"Make sure you drink plenty of water to replace all those fluids you lost.” There’s a light laugh at a wink.

“Oh, and your ass might leak a bit. I pumped a hell of a lot of lube up there since it was your first time,” she adds on her way out the door.

“Got it. Thanks,” Derek replies, totally on autopilot.

After Kate is gone, he sits there for several minutes his attention lost in the dust motes dancing in the light cast by the shed’s single grimy window. Finally, somewhat stiffly, he hops off the table. He pretends not to be aware of what aches despite his healing.

Other than these “twinges” all he feels is numb.

Going over to the sink he re-wets the rags and washes himself. He erases the afternoon with each swipe. He pretends not to see the blood on the cloth either when he cleans between his cheeks.

He’s fully dressed, driving mindless, five miles from the outskirts of the preserve when he’s finally forced to pull over.

Windows down halfway, the air buzzes with the warm up of early evening insects. Despite the lingering heat, he's wearing his coat, unwilling to forgo the way his new leather jacket hugs him like soft armor.

Derek drapes himself over his steering wheel and silently sobs.

He has no idea how long he’s been crying when the phone in his pocket starts ringing. He knows who it is already. He doesn’t want to answer, but avoiding the call will just make things worse. Composing himself, he flips the phone open.

“What?” He hopes his mother hears teenage surl and not tears.

“That’s no way to say hello to your mother. I raised you better than that.”

Hearing his alpha’s voice, remembering how he longed for her earlier, Derek is overwhelmed. He’s also gripped by how filthy he feels.

“Sorry, mama.”

He hasn’t called her that since he was fourteen and it clearly takes her aback. “Yes… Well…

“Look I gave all my children a phone so there’d be contact. Don’t think you get to be the exception, Derek Sebastian.” The usual crispness is missing from Talia’s voice. It’s replaced with concern. “Is everything okay?”

Alpha tones washing over him, Derek longs to confess. Beta wounded, he wants to tell his mom in a rush just how totally not _okay_ everything is at the moment.

He’s just about to say something when his phone beeps. Pulling it away from his ear he sees a text from Kate.

_Hey stud! Just wanted to tell you again how absolutely amazing you were today. Can’t wait to play again. Maybe at your place next time? You did mention you have some of your own secret spaces there._

_Xoxoxo_

_Kate_

“Derek?”

Between his mother’s voice and Kate’s text Derek realizes saying anything about what happened less than an hour earlier is just going to upset the two women he most cares about.

 _Shouldn’t be so oversensitive,_ he chides himself. _A little rough play between consulting adults is all._ He knows every word in that sentence is false the moment he thinks it.

He also knows after what happened, love or not, he should end this thing with Kate. But, he also understands already he won’t.

“Everything’s fine, mom. Long day is all.”

He’s grateful that even with alpha ears as sensitive as hers Talia can’t hear his heartbeat over his cellphone.

“Well, since you didn’t call back, I’m taking that to mean you will be here for dinner. Which is going to be served in ten minutes.

"Like I said in my message that you didn't bother to reply to, we're eating early so your father and I can make that school board meeting tonight.”

His emptied bowels have left Derek's belly hollow. Still, eating is the last thing he wants to do right now. But given how important pack-time is to his parents there’s no easy way to get out of it.

He prays he can behave normally enough not to raise any concerns.

“I’ll be there in five.”

“Hope you pulled over to take this call, young man.” His mom’s tone is light but it’s clear she’s not joking.

Derek grunts his assent.

“Good. Okay. See you in a few, sweetie.” The alpha “I love you” that follows rather than comfort, leaves Derek feeling like he’s bleeding from a dozen shallow cuts again.

Thankfully his mom hangs up before he’s prompted to say it back.

Setting his phone on the seat beside him, Derek restarts the Camaro. As he does, his phone pings with another message he knows is from Kate.

Like his mother, regardless of when she texts, she expects him to answer her promptly.

He sits there ignoring her hail for another minute, knuckles white on the wheel.

Then he sighs and picks up his phone to text her back.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading.


End file.
